BAZZA'S TOP TIPS
MY DIARY
July 16th 2008
What are you lot going on about my rug? It’s the same rug my dad bought me last winter, it’s not a new one!!!
Mind you I think he should go buy me a new one 
and this DOES NOT make my bum look big!!!
And what’s with all those ‘umans selling me frens? Blu 
NOOOOOO!!!!! April, YAYYY, err I mean NOOOOO!!!!
Make sure your moms sell you to someone with a poo-ter so we can still hear from you and stuff.
Oh yeah by the way I’m in the paddock next to Cherry 
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July 12th 2008
Bloody cheek!!! I get no respect around here. There I am trying to get some shut eye and Toothy is rambling on in the background as usual, so I tell him to shut it, next minute De Minky starts laughing so I tell her to button it as well and she goes and blows a raspberry at me.
What the!!!
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July 5th 2008
:( Nooooooooo
Heard from Big Joes Mum that he has gone to the big paddock in the sky *sob*
We will all miss him so much
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July 4th 2008
Woohoo sorrta, she’s back!!!
Dad brought De Minky back on the float last night, poor thing has been off working and stuff
The hay headed pygmy has been having riding lessons on her all week and mum took her to the local arena for lots of lots of circles and figures of 8’s and cantering and stuff
No wonder she looks tired, I felt a bit bad for her having to do all that work so I let her have the hay first.
Gee I’m a top horse Actually I only did it cos I fancied a bonk
July 3rd 2008
They took my baby away from me
They took De Minky off in the float on Tuesday and I haven’t seen her since.
I was just getting use to her as well, oh well she was a bossy moohead anyway
Now it’s back to just me and grumble guts Toothy, oh what bliss meh!!
July 1st 2008
Hoof and a kick for the first of the Month, no returns, white fluffy things with big teeth and white round tails that eats carrots and stuff and all that.
Anyway, my bad
I just remembered why I liked being in a paddock with all my gelding mates, not cos I’m gay cos I’m not, or at least Cherry says I’m not after that night down in the bottom paddock last summer, or was it BFM? Actually might have been Mouse, anyway.. It’s cos mares give me the shits.
So there I am in my paddock just minding my own business and along comes “De Minky” next minute she’s giving it all that, oi Bazz move over that way, quit your wind sucking, let me have the water first, blah blah. I’m like what the …..?
So De Minky says she gets to call the shots in the paddock cos she’s the Alpha mare, I’m err ok, your the only mare Monkey, I mean Minky, but whateverrrrr!!!!
I remember the last mare that tried to convince me they were boss of my paddock and that got sorted pretty quick, BFM never did like me after that
Anyway, go on then, I’ll indulge you cos I’m bored and it’s either that or listen to Toothy talking about some gobbledeegook.
So I spent the afternoon getting herded by some stumpy 14hh mare on testosterone She seemed pretty pleased with herself being the boss and all that.
Later in the afternoon I see this pygmy walking to the stable, and I’m thinking what’s that all about then, and then I remembered Dad had gone away for the weekend with my mum somewhere so it must be the neigh-bors pygmy coming to feed us.
Sure enough across the paddock she comes, hay in hand and pops it in the feed bath. Next thing De Minky heads straight for the feed. NOOOOOOOO NOT THE HAY!!!!
Well that was that. Teeth in arse, De Minky runs off, my teeth are still attached to her rug…rippppppppppp!!!!.
Whooops Oh bugger, Dad is soooo going to be mad at me.
There is now a foot long rip in her new rug and Dad will have to take it to the saddle shop to get fixed, no idea how I’m going to get off of this one, maybe I’ll blame Toothy Either way De Minky has now decided to re-think the whole boss of the paddock thing What, no, really
And for all of you that are going to tell me off, don’t start!!! I only bit the rug, I didn’t bite her bum, anyway I still have plans for that
Oh behave Bazz
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June 22nd 2008
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! THEY HAVE TAKEN HER AWAY
OMG I have never cried so much, the hay headed pygmy came and got Minky and put a head stall on her and an rope and took my baby away from me
One minute I’m talking to her and the next minute she’s gone.
I’m running up and down the fence line trying to find her and I’m shouting out for her “OI HORN BAG” but nothing
Oh hold on!!! opps, the hay head was walking her behind the stable
She’s back in the paddock again now Duh I feel so silly.
Dad said if I’m a good boy he will take her rug off later so I can see her nekid … yeah me be good
He also said that Cherry found out about my new mare friend and is not too happy about it, opps.
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June 21st 2008
OMG!!! OMMMMGGGG!!!!!!
You are so not going to believe this. Ok you will cos I’m telling you and it’s true, but anyway…
Mum and Dad turned up earlier with the mobile dunny and I’m like ohhh noooo here we go again. Err bye Taffy, nice to see you again, blah blah, bugger off, oh hang on, what if I’m going??? Ohhh nooo, I like it here with dad, that’s not fair
Both me and Taffy are looking at the float wondering which one of us is going and the hay headed pygmy came over and grabbed Taffy, so I’m like phewwwwww!!!! Well Taffy mate, no doubt I will see you again, you take care eh, The pygmy told Taffy he was going back to mums so he would be able to see Cherry, Nobby and Clarity and the rest of the gang, and he’s like, thank god for that, seriously that bloody hobbit was driving me mad, Bazz mate you are so welcome to him
Well that’s that I thought to myself, of well I don’t mind toothy to be honest. I know he goes on and on and all that but you just gotta respect that hair
Anyway the mobile dunny door comes down to let Taffy in and just about to say my final goodbyes to Taffy when I’m like AIRRRR HAIRRRR LAIRRRR, inside the dunny is this yummy looking light bay mare.
Dad gets her off the float and walks her over to my paddock. Here you go Bazz, thought you might like some company. Jeez Dad you beauty. Dad introduced me to my new paddock mate / squeeze “Minky” the 14.2hh Australian Stock / Quarter horse cross.
Dad decided that the hay headed pygmy was just a bit big for Taffy and she needed something a little bigger for Pony Club and one of mums pygmies was really missing Taffy. Hay head can still ride Taffy to Pony Club for a little while and then switch to Minky. All I got out of that was Bazz you don’t have to go to Pony Club Sorted, and I get a horny mare to oggle at all day
I’m in lurvvvveeee.
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June 20th 2008
Cor blimey trousers. I rekon the hackers visit this site more than anyone else does Really you people need to go get out, meet people and stuff rather than sitting in your sad little darken rooms hacking peoples websites.
Anyway no harm done, fixed in 2 minutes as always, lost a few posts cos Dad didn’t back up the database AGAIN!!! but well, it was all melancholy dribble anyway
What did you miss since May 26th? Welll Nobby left the building. Dad sent him over to mums for some re-education and that was for the running off bit and the not getting in the float bit. They had to drug him again to get him floated and since then he has been working hard every day That will teach him, tried to warn him, but what do you do eh.
Taffy came back the day Nobby left, twas good to see him and we had a good catch up gossip, he really didn’t quite know what to make of Toothy, kept saying someone really needs to hoof that mumbling hobbit. Three weeks later he’s still driving Taffy mad, just as Taffy starts drifting off to sleep, Toothy rocks up and starts moaning on about something or other.
Oh yeah and Dad went off on a melancholy bend fest and had a major sook about not wanting to update the site anymore cos him and mum were not together again, personally I think he’s just lazy which is a big statement coming from me and all that, anyway I have seem mum coming and going rather a lot of late so I think he’s just looking for sympathy or a hoof in the head, maybe he just needs me to give him a big hug.
May 26th 2008
Opps Nobby is in the satans puppies stable again dog house for you ‘Umans.
The hay headed pygmy took Nobby out for a ride and he was fussing a bit when she was getting him saddled but he was ok, and then she took him out of the main paddock gate to the road and went out for a ride on him.
Next minute, all hell has broken loose. He only got about 700m up the road before he went into a panic cos he missed me so much. What a poof. Anyway the pygmy gets off him and when she is off, he rears up like Silver on the loan arranger, and bolts home. He comes screaching to a stop at the front gate.
Bazz mate let me back in!!
Get stuffed Nobby, go away you are suppose to be off having a ride.
But I miss you and I don’t want to be away from you!
Oh ffs Nobby, seriously!!! That’s just pathetic.
Anyway Nobby decided he is going to go try and find a hole in the fortified electric fence and starts running up and down the fence line, so I started chasing up and down with him, it was so funny, he had the sooks on big time
Bazzzzzz just let me in!!
Next minute dad comes out of the house stable to see what’s going on.
Turns out the hay headed pygmy had called dad on the phone thingy and he was not impressed.
He opened the gate and Nobby ran in and then started doing laps of the house paddock. Dad just stood there waiting for Nobby to finish. Eventually he settled down and Dad got him untacked, I’m still laughing at Nobby
Dad just turns around and say’s “Not sure why you find this so funny Bazz, looks like you will be going to Pony Club now if the Hay head can’t ride Nobby”
Err gulp!!!!
May 23rd 2008
Mental note to self, Dad comes home early on Fridays!!!
Why do I keep forgetting that, bit of an awkward moment in the paddock when Dad came up the road and saw me and Nobby hooning around the paddock It was bloody Nobby’s fault.
Actually to be fair it was Toothys fault, he had been winding Nobby up all day, muttering and gibbering absolute bollox to the point where Nobby couldn’t take anymore of it.
I’m just minding my own business in the stable paddock and next minute I hear Nobby yell out “JUST STFU YOU HAIRY LITTLE MONG HEADED HOBBIT” Puhahah, what the???
And then Nobby has gone mental, he chasing toothy around the main paddock yelling at him and toothy is letting out these pig roots at Nobby, oh it was all too much. It was hysterical. I started laughing which set Toothy off, which made Nobby even madder than he was already.
He’s now galloping around the paddock bucking as he’s going, Toothy has ducked between the trees to escape the wrath of Nobby and Nobby is just getting more and more pissed.
He is now literaly doing laps LOL well that was it, the racehorse in me kicked in. I started galloping up and down the fence line winding up Nobby… Too slow mate!!! This is a gallop no-nuts, with that a did this huge bolt and flew along the fence line and screamed to a halt at the gate.
errrr, hi Dad. You’re err home early.
Hows the hoof feeling today Bazzy?
errrrr urrrmmmm ahhhh… It was Nobby.
Yeah right Bazz, well drag that poor sore hoof of yours over to the barn so I can change your dressing, and yes you can stay in this paddock, just take it easy will you please you stoopid doof.
Phewww!!!! Again
Dad was actually really good, he went out and got me a hoof care kit so I have a nice hoof cover on now to keep it all dry and keep the medicine in, he was really happy with it and said it was healing really well. He gave the hole a poke when he put the medicine in and it didn’t hurt or anything so he says maybe a couple of more days and he will take the dressing off, and I can stay in the stable paddock over the weekend cos he wants me to eat the grass!!!!
Sorted, I loves me Dad.
May 22nd 2008
Poor old Dad, he came home early from work today, not at all well. He picked up a virus thingy and was all sleepy and achey. He gave me some of my medicine and went inside the big stable for most of the day.
He came out a little later to go pick up one of the pygmies and was just about to drive off when he stopped the Jeep, got out and walked up to me and asked why I wasn’t limping.
I’m like err I was, honest, ouch my hoof.
He’s looking at me with that “Bazz you’re lying again” look on his face, god I hate that.
So I’m just stood there, I can’t move cos he will figure out that I’m not actually limping anymore, I tried lifting my leg up so it looked like it was hurting but I could tell he wasn’t buying any of it.
So do I have to go back to the main paddock now?
He said I didn’t, I could stay in the stable paddock, he was just pleased I wasn’t in pain anymore.
Phewwwww!!!!! That was close.
May 21st 2008
OUCH!!!! OMG MY FOOT IS HANGING OFF!!!!
I have a hole the size of Nobby in my hoof and it’s hurting so much I had to hop around the paddock all day, couldn’t even get to my feed without limping.
Even Dad was worried and said he would have to get the horsie doctor out to see me.
I’m waiting all day, for the vet thingy to come and fix me, and then I see a car pull up at the paddock.
It was my old mummy Dad had called her for the vets number and she came over to have a look and fix me up.
She was great, she put mooka honey on my hoof and bandages and gauze and cotton stuff and, and, and more stuff and it felt much better.
Just as she finished Dad came home from work and she told him that I had a small hole just behind the frog, I’m like wtf??? It’s not small it’s massive and where is the frog? If I wasn’t limping I’d jump on the slimy little pond dwelling thingy. Turns out she meant the frog on my hoof. I HAVE A FROG ON MY HOOF?????
Dad told me to just shut up so he could hear what was going on, mum then explained that I probably had a fection thingy cos of the mud that we have cos of all the rain and that I should stay in the main house paddock until my foot has healed up.
YEAHHH!!!! WOOOHOOO!! Up yer nose Nobby, I get to go in the house paddock with Dad and the hay and the feed and the lush green grass, think it might take like forever for my foot to heal
May 18th 2008
Horraayyy!!! Dad came home this afternoon.
He has been away for the weekend and had organised for one of local pygmies to come feed us when he was gone.
Not one bloody carrot!!! Not one I tell ya, and I bet she gave the new house panther a treat.
Anyway I let Dad know I was needing some attention and he gave me the biggest rub and cuddle and stuff.
He told me on Friday when he was at work a Pig wandered in to his factory, this is in the City by the way, not here in the country where we live but in the middle of Melbourne. I laughed so hard when he showed me the photo on his phone.
Anyway Dad went back into the big stable and came back out a little later and started painting the mobile dunny again, it’s starting to look right good, Dad was cussing like mad though because as soon as he painted a section these little flies came and landed on the bit he just painted… haha brilliant.
It should be all finished in a couple of weeks and I’ll get dad to pop up some pictures.
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May 12th 2008
Happy Mooooooothers Day to everyone in Hamerica and anywhere else that’s Moooooooothers Day today
Sorry, got cows on the brain still.
I tried to outstare one of them yesterday, jesus they just don’t give up do they. Bog eyed muppets all of em, and they can’t run to save their lives, which might explain why dads always cooking them, so glad I can run super fast
This one moo was just stood still for like half an hour just staring and staring, I lasted about 30 seconds before I had to eat something again. Even Nobby was like, so what’s that all about then Bazz.
Maybe she’s stuck and can’t mooooooove
Anyway finally she wanders over to the fence and went to stick her head in to get some of my hay that had blown across the paddock. I was just about to shout OMG NOOOOOOOO NOT THE HAY!!! when Toothy went over and started having a go at her.
It was so funny, little critter had his ears back and everything and started grumbling away at her big time, she must have thought he was some physco nut bag (which he is btw) and backed off and ran back to her herd.
Me and Nobby started laughing and it was even funnier cos Toothy had worked himself into a right state and was going right off about how they have all that grass but they still tried to steal our hay, I’m like, bitch be cool, but he wasn’t a happy chappy bless him.
Dad came out a little later and started messing with my Dunny, he had this big noisy thing that sprayed stuff all over the float, when he had finished it was looking all clean and shiny. Dad said he had just painted it so it looks nice and he’s going to start on me next cos he wants me to have loads of white like Cherry
Silly man, trot along before I have to flick a food bucket at you as well.
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May 9th 2008
BOO!!!!!!
It’s ok I’m still alive.
Sorry for the delay in my updates but my Dad (BFI) blew up his computer thingy when he stuck a screwdriver in it and forgot to turn off the ‘lectric first, guess now he knows how I feel about the paddock fence
So what have you missed?
Wellllll, dad got a new bazzmobile floaty dunny thing off of eHay so he can try getting Nobby off to Pony Club. We shall see I’ll get dad to post some pics at the weekend seeing as he has had such a long break from webby stuff.
It was so foggy this morning I lost Nobby in the paddock. I called out to him and he started mooing to me, I’m like that’s so funny Nobby, think I’ll have to hoof you for that. I went over to where I could hear Nobby and still couldn’t see him, and then as I got closure he started taking shape and then i realised it was one of those stoopid cows in the next paddock I could hear Nobby laughing at me off to the side and then about 10 of the cows came up to the fence and started mooing at me.
Jesus things people do to keep themselves entertained!! Oh well got bored of that and flicked my feed bin over the fence at one of the cows and they all run off. Me and Nobby were in fits, Toothy was grumbling on about cruelty to animals, hugging trees and god knows what else. We were still laughing when dad came to feed us, he’s looking around for the feed bin which is now over in the next paddock but he can’t see it because of the fog.
I’m stood there pointing my ears at Nobby as if to say it was him, he did it Dad ended up having to get the spare bin from the stable, now all I have to do is figure out how to get the bin back before the fog lifts and dad see’s it.
I was thinking of just asking the cows if I can have my bowl back Maybe I’ll con them into a game of volley bucket and quit as soon as they flick it over the fence.
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April 28th 2008
Well I never….
I found out from dad today that the BFM Bonnie is living just up the road from me, I wondered what the pong was, that will be those huge poo piles of hers.
Remember BFM got sold last year cos she was all marey and bit my Dad.
Well she went to a new ‘uman miles and miles away and the new ‘uman couldn’t cope with her or something cos she was problematic, no shit LOL
Anyway they sold her to a local riding school about 6km’s away for $100 …. ouch
Think they will use her as a broodmare or something, just hope they don’t coming begging me to service her, she might bite me
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April 27th 2008
Wooohhooooo I won the final race, obvious result really, home turf, racing legend etc etc.
Anyway full details are in the racing section, other than me blitzing the field it was pretty close and the top four changed so much I had no idea who was behind me.
Congrats to Indy in V.A who ended up as the over all points winner behind me, and to be fair he did beat me in one of the races, only cos I was pacing myself
Indy can you get your mom to email me your address so I can get dad to send you your winners rug.
Thanks to everyone that registered over the three races and for those that ran, top effort everyone.
I’m off to go hit the winners bath with a couple of mares and some champagne
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April 25th 2008
Wooohooo look at me.
Me, me , me , me , me. It’s all about me by the way.
Dad put my new rug on earlier which came from my brilliant sponsor Carousel Equine Apparel (www.carouselequine.com.au)
The winner of the big race this weekend will also get a winners rug handmade by them but not the same cos there is only one me.
God I look hot :)
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April 23rd 2008
Ho-hum
Sorry guys, phantom idiot has returned again.
Site was hacked again this morning. Same idiot as last time.
Anyyyywayyyy, other than about 2 mins of inconvenience it doesn’t really impact on the site.
The last race in the Bazzy Bollox Triple Crown will be run this weekend.
The bad news is anyone that registered earlier in the week, your registrations got eaten.
Might be just easier whilst wanker chops is around to email me your registrations (bazzy@bazzyboy.net) and that way if the database gets knocked off again, dad will still have them.
Also don’t forget there are points for this race and those points will be added to those from the other two races to determine the over all winner and who will get to have the exclusive Bazzy Boy winners rug made by our cool sponsor Carousel Equine Apparel
April 18th 2008
The competition entry page is now fixed so you can sign up for the last race.
Someone deleted the database (again)
Stoopid hacker, yawn, boring now!!!
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April 14th 2008
OMG!!! It’s all gone wrong.
First of all it started when the owners of dads big stable turned the electric fence on. Normally not such a big drama except we didn’t know there was an electric fence there. If we had have done, Toothy for certain wouldn’t have had his head in between it and be eating hay now, would he?
Except he was Boy I really didn’t think a horse so small could move so fast, in fact he moved so fast that both me and Nobby half near crapped ourselves and leapt out of the way, yes, that would be correct, into the fence.
Next minute me, Nobby and Toothy are all charging around the paddock trying to get away from whatever it was that zapped us. Toothy’s gob has gone into over drive and he’s carrying on like a two bob watch about getting some notice the next time.
I have turned around to tell Toothy to just shut it and there are about 30 black and white cows in the “what was an empty paddock” next to us staring at these three horses running around in circles.
How embarrasing!!!! No idea how they got there, or why they are there, they smell, they can’t run and if they even sniff my hay, the hoofs come off.
Stoopid cows!!!
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April 12th 2008
Oh whateverrrr!!!
Race results are up in the racing section for the Paris race.
Yes there were points for this race, no I didn’t win it.
Shut it!! Don’t start or I’ll hoof ya
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April 11th 2008
Wa-HAY, dad came home with a ute full of feed for us today, which was good news cos he ran out a couple of days back and hasn’t been able to get to the food store before it closes cos he’s been working.
It was sooooooooo yum. You should have heard Toothy carry on, he was mumbling and grumbling for about 1/2 an hour. And then he abruptly stopped, just like that, amazing eh? Nobby reckons it was cos I hoofed him … me?
Anyway least we had loads of hay, dad said he are getting low on that now as well though, I’m like OMG NOOOOOOOO NOT THE HAY!!! So if anyone is in my neck of the woods and has some can you let my dad know please, and he will come pick it up and pay you and stuff. (no crap though cos it’s for me)
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April 8th 2008
Ho-hum, the nasty little hacker has returned again… so droll, anyway I lost the comments from the last few days, luckily I had back ups of the posts cos I had no idea what I had written That typhoon must have blown my brain away
Thanks everyone that mailed my dad to let him know. He’s been a bit slack lately actually, I might have to hoof him when he feeds me tonight. Last night dad got rid of my mobile dunny YAY!!! so now I don’t have to go in it any more, dad said he would get a bigger one for me and Nobby cos Nobby is too scared of the old one after he got traumatised in it.
Anyway I’m off to eat some hay, so bugger orf.
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March 31st 2008
Seriously …. We had a hurrican / typhoon thingy come through here yesterday, the wind was 130kmh which is nearly as fast as me and I thought poor old Toothy was going to get himself blown out of the paddock. Things were flying everywhere, all Dads stuff from the front of the big stable blew over the paddock, the hay headed pygmy couldn’t feed us because the feed just blew away. It was an absolute nightmare, nightgelding even.
And then just when i thought it couldn’t get any worse the hay stack next to dads shed took off. I’m like OMG NOOOOOOO NOT THE HAY!!!!! It went everywhere, except for near me that is. Anyway there was stuff all over the place, my hair was a mess I can tell ya, it goes all quiet and just after that dad comes home, gets out of his ute and has this “what the” look all over his face.
I just stood there looking at him exhausted after playing dodge the tree for two hours straight and Toothy is grumbling away about ozone layers, global worming or some crap, who knows what he was on about. Not a fun day I can tell you.
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March 30th 2008
Stoopid ‘Umans. There I was wide awake an hour early waiting for Dad to feed me, only to find out the clocks go back next weekend :) Anyway no harm done. I had a great day today, Dad came and got me and took me out for a ride, it was so cool, just went for a walk and I was allowed to stop to eat the long grass outside and stuff. One the of pygmies (the stumpy one) was riding Toothy. Not sure what either of them made of that :) The other pygmy (the hay headed one) led toothy on a long lead rope.
When we got back, Dad let me stay in the house paddock so I could eat all the nice green grass around the stable….yum And Dad and Hay head tried to get Nobby on the float again, no luck though :) He hasn’t floated since the time he was sold and went on that really long journey in the float. Dad reckons he was traumatised by the journey so much we might never get him back on again. Poor bloke, sorts of stuffs it up for Hay head going to Pony club next week, Dad said she might have to take me instead LOL … yeah right.
Mind you there will heaps of mares there :) … maybe I will
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March 29th 2008
Dads been busy ;) The old forum was hacked so no-one could join, so Dad has put up a new and updated forum with loads of new safety features and stuff and now everyone that wants to join can.
Sorry but it will mean having to re-register and re-upload your avatars etc. Dad also said he will try and run the Paris race later today / tomorrow so keep an eye out in the racing section.
Oh, oh, ewww, err, I forgot. Dad got a phone call the other morning from someone in Hamerica that might be writing stuff about me for their news and stuff. They are doing an article about pets / animals with websites and phoned my Dad cos mine is an award winning one
Apparantly it was someone news thingy called the New York Times, or summink like that.
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March 26th 2008
Well didn’t the comments to the last post get a bit err um, yes, well, anyway. So April is having a sprog!!! Wasn’t me ;) And it wasn’t Rum cos he was running around with his new filly / mare, and it wasn’t Nobby cos, oh never mind.
Annnyyyyyway. Dad went to work and left the hay headed pygmy in charge of things LOL ho hum, so she thought it would be a top idea to do some float practice and didn’t quite shut the gate to the big stable paddock, so me and Toothy thought it would be a good idea to crash the gate, raid the chicken hut, pounce on the haystack and eat all the hay and generally get up to mischief, like you do Poor thing!!!
What must have started out as a good idea / bonding session with her Nobby, shortly turned into a free for all, lets own the paddock fest.Lucky Dad saw the funny side of it when he came home :) He gave me a swift boot up the bum (after giving me a nice big hug and rub) and we went back into our normal paddock, feeling somewhat triumpant I might add.
Toothy raids the old chicken hut for some lush green grass
And then goes and hides in the float.
Wonder what’s under the cover then?
WOW!!! It’s a load of hay!!!
Oh yum yum yum yum yum!!!!!
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March 22nd 2008
OMG!!! That’s all I can say on that.
The second race has been run for the Paris Leg of the Triple Bollox thingy wotsit. Soooooo close.
Full details and video in the racing section along with the final 20 for the Paris Race which goes towards the points for the Triple Crown.
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March 21st 2008
Well that was a flurry of attention, not sure I was happy with all of it, mind. Dad came over to say hello earlier and brought me an apple, that was yum, and then he caught me and walked me in to the house paddock and gave me a tub of feed whilst he picked all the bot eggs of me. To be fair I had heaps after that hot spell last week and all the bots decided to go gang up on me.
I was a bit over it after 1/2 hr of dad scraping eggs of my legs and tummy and stuff, some were a bit hard for him to get to especially when I kept moving me legs He growled at me!!!
And then dad put a new bandage on my knee with all that honey stuff, and gave me loads of hugs and stuff.
And then it all started going a bit wrong!!! First he got that carot stick out and started making me do that parelli stuff and then he made me run!!! He actually lunged me!!! And he made me poop at the trot cos he thought I was only stopping cos I was lazy, and I was too scared to stop so it was sort of a case of the trots at the trot
Dad said I had to train for the big race in Paris like all the other horsies.
Think I’ll go lie down now
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March 11th 2008
I’m sorry I have been very busy of late, yesterday I played a little game called “RUN AWAY IT’S A BOT FLY” that kept me amused for most of the morning, I hid behind a tree until it found me and then I ran around the paddock kicking out all over the place until he finally went and then I hid behind another tree until he found me again.
In the afternoon I played “RUN AWAY IT’S A BOT FLY” It was a bit like the game I played in the morning except with a slight variation, this time he got two of his mates to join in and the little buggers hounded me all afternoon.
And then later, I worked out if I did a complete lap of the paddock at full gallop, bucked a few times and made the odd snorting noise, they finally gave up and went away, peace at last !!!!, the sun is out, the bot flies are gone and I’m just stood there soaking it all up, and then…. Ouch my feet!!! “RUN AWAY IT’S A BULL ANT”
I can’t bloody win !!!!
And on top of that we are in the middle of a semi heat wave thingy so I can tell you I was not a happy chappy.
Oh look here comes dad with some hay and my feed.
“Hi Bazzzzzzzy, hows ya day mate?”
“Naff off dad before I pick up Toothy and lob him at your head you big doof”
“Think I’ll just go back to the big stable then eh Bazz?”
“Top idea dad, run along”
Sigh …….
March 3rd 2008
Well who’s a clever ‘Uman then? Dad put your hand down you idiot.
Firstly there are bugger all flies around at night, secondly when you leave a horsies fly screen on and it gets dark, they can’t see anything, like that tree stump for example.
So yes I’m moody today, yes my knee hurts thank you for asking, YES IT’S YOUR FRIGGIN FAULT, yes I still love you, now where is my breakfast?
Sigh…
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March 2nd 2008
Oh my oh my
Well he fixed it Dad came over with his arms full of plastic pipes, metal pipes, and water building stuff and fixed up the water pipe so I now have water again woo hoo.
But he wasn’t too happy with me about it. He’s on his knees trying to connect the new pipe in the hole in the ground and next minute he’s started cussing like mad and slapping his knee, the bull ants had bitten him right on his knee cap. He’s jumped up and is cussing at me and then he’s let out this big yelp and dropped his jeans right in the middle of the paddock PUHHAAHAH. I’m like err dad put it away mate
Couple of bull ants had climbed up the inside of his jeans leg and had bitten him on the bum OMGGGGGG it’s too funny. He’s running in circles cussing, with his jeans around his ankles slapping at his bum. Poor old Nobby had tears running down his face, toothy is wide eyed with a OMG look on his face and I’m steadily backing up into the tree’s ready to duck for cover.
Dads looked at me and started laughing, he looked so funny. Oh my I’m never going to let him forget this
March 1st 2008
opps my bad
Dad growled at me big time last night cos I broke the water pipe, actually I pulled it clean out of the ground oops. We have this water pipe that feeds water from the tank to our paddock. Last night dad had to dig a big hole to find the end of the pipe that is under the ground and then he had to make a temporary join so that he could give us some water. The hole he dug was right on top of this bull ants nest, so he’s on his knees trying to connect a pipe, there is water going everywhere and the ants kept hanging on to my dads arms and hands and biting him. Oh dear. One crawled up his leg ..eeek you should have heard him LOL
These ants are like an inch long and have a real nasty nip, so all I could hear for half an hour was “OWWW!! BAZZZZZZZZ” “OWWW!! BAZZZZZZZZ” “OWWW!! BAZZZZZZZZ” “OWWW!! BAZZZZZZZZ” “OWWW!! BAZZZZZZZZ I’M GOING TO FRIGGIN KILL YOU”
I think I’ll go hide in the trees for a couple of days
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February 27th 2008
We got some hay, woohoo!!!
My dad came home tonight with his UTE full of hay. There was loads of it everywhere, I’m like err yummmmm. I was jumping around trying to get his attention “bring it to me, bring it to me” He went and stuck it all in the shed
Mind you I don’t think I could have eaten it all in one go anyway LOL, would have tried though.
February 25th 2008
Settle down, don’t have a go at me cos my blog hasn’t been updated, it’s my slack arse Dads fault
To be fair he’s been really busy with his new job and I have seen his stable light go off earlier in the evening cos he’s off to bed early, still a slacker though if you ask me, anyway despite what some people think, he’s not off Jeeping or playing his PS3 and spending all his time fluffying around me, mind you I do get my daily dose of big hugs and scratches and stuff so I’m happy
Anyyyyway, Nobby has the sooks tonight, the hay headed pygmy made him do some work :) even put a saddle on him and took him for a ride, poor bloke didn’t have a clue what had hit him and if that wasn’t funny enough she is training him to get on the float so he had to eat his dinner from inside the float. I was actually impressed, he actually got on it all by himself, I was half expecting him to have one of his rearing hissy fits but for once he was behaving.
Even Toothy was impressed, he started grumbling on about something or other that had bugger all to do with what was going on so I could tell he was excited.
I’ll try and get Dad to put up a picture of Nobby eating his dinner on the float just so April will believe me
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February 21st 2008
Stranger warning…stranger warning!!!
The hay headed pygmy invited her friend around to the big stable and she turned up on a horsie, I saw it about 500m away so I’m like…go away, flee, step away from the cookie jar!!!
Anyway next thing, it turns into our paddock and the other pygmy tied it to a tree near our gate and disappered into the big stable.
Me and Nobby are both stood at the gate looking at this weird looking horsie, it was all white with these big brown splats all over it. It looked like it got a bit too close to Cherry when she did one of those huge sloppy farts of hers
So we are stood there going “OI!!! who are you?” “errr I’m a horsie” splatty replies.
Like no, what, really, nah your teasing us aren’t you? We can see your a horsie you idiot, I mean what you doing here?
Anyway, turns out ol’ splatty wasn’t that bad a dude to chat to. He only lives up the road and said his mom said she would come up on him to see my dads pygmy, so he may be seeing us quite a bit.
Coooool, we got a new friend
February 20th 2008
I got a valentine, woohoo Buddy sent me a valentines card all they way from Hamerica. I can’t believe it. Dad was miffed cos he didn’t get one but his horsie did, he said something about it being totally ducked or something like that
THANKS BUDDY !!!!
Dad had be going a good one today, he went off with the mobile dunny this morning and I’m like, hmmmm what’s he up to. I figured out we had another horsie coming, I was so excited. When he came back like hours later I was running up the fence line, neighing like crazy, flicking my head in the air and pig rooting and stuff to show the new sexy looking mare what a prize stallion I am.
He pulls up and opens the back and I’m like cool it’s a, err, eh? A set of golf clubs!!!!!
I’m like wtf is that!!! I have been going out of my mind all afternoon thinking you were going to get another horsie and you come back with an empty dunny and some golf clubs. That was so unfair he could have just stuck those in the Jeep.
Dad told me to settle down and quit getting all tempremental, and I’m like well fair dinkum Dad I was really expecting you to bring me another horsie to play with, he goes no, I needed the float to take a load of stuff to the dump, so I’m thinking it would have been nice to know that this morning, and then I realised what he just said and I’m like bloody hell dad that’s my Dunny, now I have to go in a stinky dunny cos you went and used it to cart rubbish around in it. THAT’S SO WRONG!!!
And then the cheeky doof turns around and says, Bazz mate you have only ever been in the stupid thing once in nearly a year, get over it.. He has a point I suppose
February 19th 2008
ok, this is just getting silly now. Earlier I was standing in the paddock minding my own. Dad walks into the shed, well not actually in like, “He walked into the shed…ouch” type thing, more of a walked through the door of the shed, anyway,he then grabs some feed, walks over to me and pops it in my food bin. I’m stood there chomping away and the next thing I can hear my tummy making weird noises, it was like it was muttering or something like that.
I look down and there underneath my tummy is Toothy the mutant ninja hobit elf dwarf things head tring to reach into my feed bin, and if that wasn’t bad enough, the senile old git was jabbering to himself about how hot it was today.
He tried to walk underneath me!!!!! to get my hay!!! So I’m like, OMG Nooooo not the hay!!!
I was seriously thinking of hoofing him one, proberbly not a nice thing to do, especially with cod face Nobby just staring at him wondering if I was really going to squash a horsie no bigger than my knee just because he wanted some food. So I just bit him instead.
How was that for compassion eh?
I might be a fearsome warrior type steed and all that, but I’m not an animal.
Oh bugger, yeah I am, oh well I mean I’m not an animal, animal. Or whatever….shut up!!!
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February 18th 2008
Ho hum.
Dad had to fire someone that worked for him before Christmas and this ‘Uman has decided to take it out on my website
You might notice wierd things happening, things not working, pages disappearing etc. Anyway, the Police have been notified so can’t say too much, just wanted to let you know what was going on.
Dad is trying to keep the site up and running, forum is bust for now (actually it’s working just you will either need to join again or wait till Dad loads the member list ) and so are the postcards, otherwise the rest is all working and easy to restore when he hacks in again.
February 16th 2008
Ouch Nobby had a lie down on top of a bull ants nest, silly duffer. Got himself bitten all over one side but the funniest one was the bite right on his bottom.
You should have seen him jump up in the air after that one LOL.
Actually I’m not sure what’s going on with him at the moment, scared of his own shadow, which is most unlike Nobby. I guess the tree in our paddock falling down didn’t help. It wasn’t a big one like the other day and when I say fell down, I actually meant I leant against it and broke it when having a scratch Don’t tell me dad or he will growl at me for sure.
It was so warm today as well, not that has anything to do with falling trees and lumps on Nobby’s bum, I just thought I would mention it.
February 14th 2008
God I’m knackered
Well that was a tough run race, about 1 second between the top dozen runners.
The video is on the media page (In the video section about half way down the page) if you want to watch the race.
For those that can’t wait any longer, here are the results of the first race.
Oh and don’t forget to re-register (use the banner at the top of the home page and fill the form in) to take part in the second race in Paris (which is in Frenchy).
The first 20 entries will run and the points are gained over all three races so you still have a chance to win even if you didn’t take part in the first race.
There will be a prize, and no I can’t win it So whoever ends up with the most points other than me, scoops the prize. And no I don’t know what it is yet
Anyway first race results and points as follows
Place 1st - Points 12 - Me (Bazzy Boy)
Place 2nd - Points 10 - Willow
Place 3rd - Points 8 - Indy in VA
Place 4th - Points 7 - Nobby No-nuts
Place 5th - Points 6 - Stardust
Place 6th - Points 5 - Tommy Boy
Place 7th - Points 4 - Magno
Place 8th - Points 3 - Angus
Place 9th - Points 2 - Blu
Place 10th - Points 1 - Holly
Place 11th - Points 0 - Madam Pago
Place 12th - Points 0 - Pour The Drinks
Place 13th - Points 0 - Disco
Place 14th - Points 0 - Toby
Place 15th - Points 0 - Amir Mortal
Place 16th - Points 0 - Trixie
Place 17th - Points 0 - Barney’s Dancer
Place 18th - Points 0 - Miracle
Place 19th - Points 0 - Buddy
Place 20th - Points 0 - April (Opps, haha)
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February 13th 2008
Bloody Nora!! Strewth!! What the??
Got scared to death last night. There I was minding my own business, actually that’s not quite true because I was talking to Nobby about his fetish for gelding hobbit ponies, which technically is his business, but anyway, next second there is an almighty loud crack and then a groan and then this sort of long pause which was just about long enough time for me to look up and wonder why half a tree was heading in my direction, followed by this huge ground trembling thump.
Bloody tree in the next paddock has gone all emo and decided to split in half, break apart, crash to the ground and land about 2m away from my paddock fence.
This by the way is a pretty big tree, well now it’s not, now it’s more like half a pretty big tree and a heap of firewood.
I’m like bloody hell Nobby did you see that? And he’s just looking at me with that clueless stunned cod like face of his, obviously no idea what just happened. I flicked my head and what was left of the tree next to the fence, and he’s like, so how did that get there?
Sigh….
Not sure what concerned dad more, the big pile of tree by the paddock fence or the big pile of poo from where I was standing when the tree fell
Anyway nuff of that. Quick update on the race
We can actually have up to 20 runners in the race so I have added 3 more horsies. So the final line up will be. (And running order)
Number 1 - Gate 6 - Me (Bazzy Boy)
Number 2 - Gate 2 - Indy in VA
Number 3 - Gate 5 - Angus
Number 4 - Gate 18 - Blu
Number 5 - Gate 3 - Disco
Number 6 - Gate 9 - Holly
Number 7 - Gate 7 - Stardust
Number 8 - Gate 1 - Toby
Number 9 - Gate 10 - Trixie
Number 10 - Gate 8 - Willow
Number 11 - Gate 12 - Amir Mortal
Number 12 - Gate 15 - Tommy Boy
Number 13 - Gate 17 - Barney’s Dancer
Number 14 - Gate 13 - Madam Pago
Number 15 - Gate 11 - Magno
Number 16 - Gate 20 - Nobby No-nuts
Number 17 - Gate 14 - Miracle
Number 18 - Gate 16 - Pour The Drinks
Number 19 - Gate 19 - Buddy
Number 20 - Gate 4 - April
Dad is going to run the race today so the results will be up a little later + the video
I’m sooooo excited.
Should be fun with such a large field, especially if you happen to get boxed in on the rails
The number of your horse (i.e number 1) will appear on your horse and will feature in the commentary, so look / listen out for it. The gate number is random but will give you an idea where in the starting gate it will be.
February 12th 2008
Get ready for the first big race of the 2008 Bazzy Bollox Triple Crown, err woohoo
Dad finally found the game err I mean all the horsies are able to get to Epsom for the race.
The line up is as follows; Sorry to all those that didn’t make this Months race but there are only 16 runners in the field.
1 Bazzy Boy
2 Indy in VA
3 April
4 Disco
5 Angus
6 Stardust
7 Willow
8 Holly
9 Magno
10 Amir Mortal
11 Madam Pago
12 Miracle
13 Tommy Boy
14 Trixie
15 Pour The Drinks
16 Barney’s Dancer (Bella)
Keep your ears up for the results which will be up as soon as Dad extracts his head from his bottom
I’m going to win anyway so don’t get too excited Mind you Indy got a tad close the last time so maybe I wont. Maybe I’ll just run at the back taking big bites out of Aprils butt so she doesn’t come last again
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February 11th 2008
No idea how this works but it was dads born day yesterday and I was the one that got loads of carrots
He came and saw me heaps and gave me loads of hugs and he also brought the bazzmobil mobile dunny home full of hay!!! WOOOHOO!!!
Annnnnnndd he let us into the big house paddock so we could munch on some nice green grass and stuff. I wish it was his born day every day
I’m really worried about Toothy. Only worried cos I’m getting real close to sitting on him Bloody thing still hasn’t stopped talking it’s been like a whole week now. I thought it was just him but all the mare ponies are like it too. Damn hobbits, sounds like a flock of gibbering loonies here at feeding time, even Nobby can’t cope with it and heads straight for the other end of the paddock when they turn up.
Dad said he will put some photos up of them when he see’s them next cos man they have the weirdest hair things going on Dad says one looks just like Tina Turner, whoever he is
Oh and dad stuck my windsucking collar back on me today. I was trying to work out how he knew I’d been windsucking, he reckons it might have something to do with the fence post being half the height it used to be was a bit of a give away
February 7th 2008
Gosh my Dad is such a slacker
He just started a new job so has been real busy, which is great, but not much help for my blog
Also means I havn’t seen much of him during the day but I get loads of hugs when he gets back, and hay, and carots, and chaff and more hugs
Not much has been happening to be honest, just getting wet. Looks like the drought has finally come to an end cos it’s been raining here most of the week.
Nobby is behaving himself, maybe, sorrta. Still needs a bite on the bum now and again to remind him who the boss is, and Toothy, cute as he is just wont stop bloody talking. He just wanders around the paddock jibbering to himself all day. Mutter mutter mutter, grumble, grumble.. senile old goat!!!
You should hear him when my dad comes out to feed us, he nickers for like 15 mins non stop, no bloody idea what he’s going on about, something about how us young bucks have it so easy and in his day… blah blah blah… whateverrrrrr
If he wasn’t so cute with that long hair thing going on I swear I’d have booted him into the other paddock by now. Err bless him
February 4th 2008
He he he.
I’m so glad No-Nuts is back.
I taught him to wind suck today Much to the hay heads annoyance.
It was really funny until he started to wind suck MY wind sucking post. Like there are about 40 posts to chose from and he goes and picks on my favourite one!!!
Well I wasn’t having that, so ears back and bite on the bum time it is then
Nobby was like, “Bloody hell Bazz what you do that for?”
Err cos your here!!!
Tomorrow I’m going to teach Toothy to stand on the ‘Umans washy bath thing so he can wind suck posts too.
How funny would that be to see my dads face when he pulls up in the jeep and me, Nobby and Toothy are all wind sucking on the same post PUHAHAH
February 3rd 2008
Well dad finally got the photo thingies off his camera thingy so here is my new paddock fodder, I mean mate Toothy
Toothy having a bad hair life
Puhahhaha bless him!!!
Check out the big fella, isn’t he cute, sorrta, maybe
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February 2nd 2008 (Special edition - Long)
OMG!!!!!!!!!
OMGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!
Well what a day that was. Today a truck turns up and my new paddock mate “2e” comes out. I thought he was named after a beer but my dad was just tricking, it’s 2 E not toohey, oh well so seeing as he’s so bloody old, Toothy it is
Toothy by the way is a 150 year old Shetland pony, 2 hands high and with the most bizarre hair thing going on.
Anyway toothy comes into my paddock and poor bloke really doesn’t know what to make of me, he tried herding me around the paddock at first until he realised I was ignoring him and going the other way, and then he tried to pig root me LOL, he’s about the height of my knee’s, what on earth was he thinking? I was going to hoof him back but didn’t want Dad shouting at me for launching him into the next suburb.
And then he tried to eat my hay!!!, my hay!!!! what the!!! anyway one bite on the arse later and I think he got the whole deal about who the boss of the paddock is.
He’s cute in a “opps sorry you seem to be stuck in my hoof” sortta way, but I do miss a horsie I can make eye contact with without having to lie down to do it.
Annnyyyyyyyywayyyyy, that’s not the reason why I’m so excited.
Dad and the pygmies went off this morning which left me most of the day enjoying watching toothy fall into the rabbit warrens, just as it started to get late, and my tummy started to go “where’s my bleeding food” I see my Bazzmobil coming down the road towards the house. Oh god, now what? I’ve only just got here.
Hold on, I smell a horsie.
OMG!!!!! You are so not going to believe this!!!
The horsie has turned itself about in the mobile dunny, so when dad turned around in the paddock to off load the horsie, there looking out over the back of the rear door is NOBBY!!!!!
OMG!!!!! NOBBY!!!!
I was stunned, I’m just looking at him like I had just seen a ghost, and then, and don’t ask me why I go running up the fenceline like a loony, neighing “Nobby is here, nobby is here” poor old toothy has just scarpered off to the other side of the paddock.
Dad lets down the back of the dunny and out strolls Nobby, looking all smiles.
“BAZZZZAAAAAA”
Dad gets the hay headed pygmy to open the gate to let Nobby in, before she knows what’s happening Toothy has bolted into the big stable paddock. Dad has lost his mind at her and is shouting something about imbeciles so I figured now was a good time to be a pain in the butt and pushed past hay head into the stable paddock too.
Dad has put Nobby in my normal paddock, he trying to catch Toothy, I’m galloping laps around the stable cos I’m so excited to see Nobby. Nobby is charging up and down the fence line trying to work out how to get into the paddock I’m in.
Poor old Dad, just sat on the ground and went “That’s f***ed”
Finally he managed to get me and Toothy back into the paddock with Nobby.
Poor old Toothy by this stage was totally traumatised by us two giant geldings hooning around the paddock, when my dad went to drop the dunny back Toothy was running towards the dunny neighing at dad “Take me with you!!!” PMSL, bless him
Just before he left, Dad went and got us some hay. Me and Nobby had a feed and a good catch up chat.
You are so not going to believe this next bit!!! I was laughing so hard I had wee coming down my legs and so many tears in my eyes I head butted my feed bin laughing so hard. Get this!!!
As you know Nobby left the old paddock last week. He had been sold him to this ‘Uman the about 4 hours away. Anyway turns out she didn’t want him cos “he wasn’t educated enough” PUHAHAHA ahhhhhh sigh, could have told you he was stoopid and saved everyone a lot of trouble, why people never ask us horsies I’ll never know.
Turns out Dad bought him for hay head to ride and so I could have him back with me again as my paddock mate.
Wooohooo way to go Dad.
Nobby is back Oh boy this is going to be sooooo cool.
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January 31st 2008
Tum tee tum, la la la, diddly doo, fa la la.
BORED!!!!
Tree, no tree, tree, no tree, ouch tree, bugger!!! didn’t see that one.
I know I’ll play this little piggy, right, this little piggy went to market. OH BUM, I only have one toe. Well that killed that then.
Ahhh I know, I spy with my little eye something begining with tree, agggghhhhhh now I gave it away and know what it is
Hmmmmmpppffff, sighhhhh.
Oh look it’s Dad, I’ll go hide behind one of these tree’s that will scare him into thinking I have bolted from the paddock.
“Oi fat knacker, get out from behind the tree ya big doof”
Bloody hell Dad what you go spoil it for!!!
I asked Dad when my new friend was coming and he said it would be in a couple of days so I’d just have to hang out until then, oh and he said he had a big surprise for me tomorrow but wouldn’t tell me what it is, something to do with the hay headed pygmy??
ohhhhh, I like surprises, hope it’s something to do with a carrot.
January 30th 2008
OMG!!!! I have been evicted
BAZZY HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!!!
Well that was one hell of a “what the” day.
Hold yer horses I’m getting there. Dad came to the big stable today with the bazzmobil (my mobile dunny) I thought either another horsie was coming or one of the others was going. Dad comes up to me and put my headstall on and leads me up to the dunny. I’m like, oh crap this ain’t good.
I told Dad I didn’t want to go and I didn’t want a new ‘Uman or go to the nasty place that old horsies go. All he said was “you do trust me don’t you Bazzy?” and I’m like “err yeah Dad, I’m just scared” and then he said, Bazz just jump on the float there’s a good fella, so I did. I walked on first time, no fuss. Dad was so pleased with me.
When the back gate was up Dad got in the float with me and said he was taking me to a new paddock, I’m like noooo I wanna stay with you!! And he said “You will be bazz, I have a big stable there and will see you every day” he then told me the ‘Umans that own the property next door have a paddock with 28 mares in it!!!!!
28 Mares!!! Bloody hell, it will drop off I know it
I heard the Jeep start up and away we went. And that was the end of my time in the paddock at Buninyong, at least for now. I will miss it but I couldn’t help thinking along the way to my new home 28 MARES!!!!
We didn’t go that far. It took about the time to eat a few carrots, the road was a bit bumpy but before I had time to get uncomfortable, I was there.
Dad opened up the Bazzmobil and I backed off and walked into my new home.
It’s not as big as Buninyong but has loads of trees for shelter and water on tap which is pumped from the dam. My Dads stable is about 50m away so I can see him all the time now.
There is also another paddock where the stable is that Dad said once I have settled he will let me come into.
I had a good look around my new paddock and settled real quick, it’s really cool, I have loads of things to windsuck and then from the distance I saw this movement of horsies coming towards me OMG!!! There really is 28 mares.
I’m in heaven!!! Hang on, something isn’t quite right here. Arn’t they suppose to get like bigger as they get nearer. 2 mins later I have 28 bloody shetland ponies looking at me. DAD!!!!! You bugger.
They are all mares Bazz honest.
Oh very f****** funny
Even I could see the funny side of it. I didn’t really care, I was just happy to be with Dad, didn’t need the chorus of “hey big boy!!!” from 28 short arsed mares though
Me and Dad had a walk around the paddock together and I got loads of hugs and scratches.
And then Dad said “Oh yeah Bazz I forgot, you will have a new buddy come stay with you tomorrow, his name is Toohey, he’s named after a famous Australian beer so he can’t be all bad He’s looking forward to seeing you so be nice, and yes he is small so don’t sit on him ok
And the straw headed pygmy will be getting another horsie soon so you will have some new friends to torment.”
So here I am in my new paddock waiting to meet my new friends and looking forward to some great new adventures.
Anyway for anyone interested, here are the photo thingies Dad took
Yeah cool Dad but I ain’t getting back in it
What the heck!!! Is that my 28 mares??? Wooo hooo
You have to be kidding!! What are they? Do I eat them??
Who you friggen looking at? Did I mention I’m a legend?
Maybe if I ignore them they will go away
Nothing to see!!! I’m not here!! Very bloody strange things they are
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January 29th 2008
God it’s quiet without Nobby. I had to taunt Taffy today but he just ignored me.
Arse. Sigh…
Bit like living in the Big Brother house here :) Wonder who is up for eviction next
January 28th 2008
And then there was four
My shortarse arch nemesis Nobby No-Nuts has left the building.
He was taken away in the Mobile dunny this afternoon to go to his new home 100’s of km’s away.
Least I wont smell him from here then
I’ll actually miss the little bloke, we had some great laughs together, drove me to dispair at times but he was a good sort.
That just leaves me, Cherry, No-name and Taffy.
I told Dad I was really upset about Nobby and the others going and was worried I would be going too and I didn’t want to be with another ‘Uman, I just wanted to stay with him and he told me not to worry about it, everything will be ok.
Phewww, even I was getting a bit worried for a moment.
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January 26th 2007
Shifttttttttyyyyyy has left the building.
Good cos he was a hopeless twat anyway
Actually for a little white pony he was ok, just let me down badly on the bucks night but he did keep me amused by his frequent disappearing and reappearing acts.
His Mom came and got him this afternoon, we all knew he was going today cos Dad told us last week, he was only here cos we would look after him until his real mom could come and get him cos the people he was on lease to didn’t like him and the stallion ‘Uman threatened to shoot him and bulldoze him into a big hole if he wasn’t picked up
Gee some ‘Umans can be really horrible.
Maybe we should all go over there and hoof him into a big hole!!!!
Oh well sad to see him go, but hey, one less gelding
Think I might play hard to get Cherry and No-name must be gagging for it by now
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January 23rd 2008
Sorry I have been a bit quiet this week, been a bit distracted. Cherry and no-name are still up in the top paddock and I’m still having to put up with the three stooges (Nobby, Taffy and Shifty) which really isn’t helping much, I might add.
Dad was really busy yesterday moving loads and loads of stuff from the big stable, he didn’t finish till really really late last night and woud have woken me up if I hadn’t have been awake already thanks to Shifty keep nudging into me every two minutes
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January 18th 2008
Well that was rubbish!!!
I swear at times I’m sharing a paddock with some right idiots. We had the whole paddock ourselves, the girlies were up the top and couldn’t see us. I had myself all set for the stripper mare and her sexy fly net etc and what do I end up with? Nobby, Taffy and Shifty getting all bloody horsie on me!!!
Me ”So Nobby, we having this bucks party?”
Nobby ”eh?”
Me “The bachelor party, you idiot, remember I told you we were going to get wasted and get some fillies in”
Nobby “oh yeah”
Me “So what ya wanna do first?”
Nobby “Eat some grass”
Me ”err OK, after that?”
Nobby “Eat some more grass”
Me “How about we run up and down the fence line like a couple of stallions and tease Cherry and no-name”
Nobby “I’m off to eat some grass”
Me “Bloody hell Nobby, you are hopeless!!! Oi Taffy, fancy running up and down the fence line?”
Taffy “I just want to graze Bazz”
Me ”Yeah, yeah, but what about after that?”
Taffy “Is there any carrots?”
Me ”No there isn’t any friggin’ carrots you mong head”
Taffy “Oh ok, I’ll eat some more grass then”
Me “STREWTH!!!!”
Me ”Oi Shifty, get you butt over here and make like a stallion”
Shifty “I’m eating”
Me “You’ll be limping in a minute mate!! Look we have the whole paddock to ourselves and a very rare chance to do some real blokey stuff, seriously if you could do anything without the mares about what would you want to do?”
Shifty “Eat some grass?”
Me “OH FOR F**** SAKE!!!!!, right that’s it I’m going!!!”
And that was that, I ended up bored out of my mind watching three brain dead geldings scoffing themselves silly on grass all night, and then running up and down the fence line on my own with my dangly bits slapping against my thighs trying to impress Cherry and No-name. No-name who’s in season at the moment obviously felt a bit sorry for me cos she backed up to the fence.
I’m looking at Cherry, who is looking daggers back at me, with that “go on, just you dare” look on her face.
Bollox I’m off to eat some grass.
January 17th 2007
Dad moved all us blokes down to the bottom paddock earlier, it was so funny. First he took me down and then went to get Nobby, Taffy and Shifty but Nobby ran away when dad went to get him and ran all the way from the big stable to the bottom paddock where I was.
So Dad walked all the way down to open the gate and Nobby, Taffy and Shifty all bolted back up the hill to the big stable. Dad was stood there with the gate open and said well you might as well go join them , so I galloped up the hill as well.
Then Dad had to walk all the way back up to the big stable, he growled at Nobby who then decided it was a good idea to stand still this time, and led Nobby down to the bottom paddock, then he had to walk all the way back and get Taffy, who thought he would run off too :) Dad finally caught him and led him down with Shifty following, whilst he is walking down, Nobby is running up and down the fence line like some rabbit on speed, neighing like mad and galloping all over the place.
Dad gets Taffy and Shifty in the bottom paddock and then walks all the way back up to the big stable to get me. This time I think he was pooped cos he stuck a bridle on me and asked if I could carry him down Bless him, so I let Dad ride down bare back to the bottom paddock and then he let me go after giving me the biggest hug and scratch.
So I’m waiting for Dad to come back with Cherry and the lushy no-name and realise that they are staying up in the top paddock!!! I’m like what the??? You can’t keep my la